Where Does Our Identity Come From

Where does our identity come from? It is a good question, isn’t it. It is something I have struggled with before. Honestly there are days I still struggle with it. Over the years I have told myself I am more than a mom. I have also told myself I am more than a nurse. Even now as I think about this question I wonder if it will ever be resolved completely.

Where Does Our Identity Come From?

I am More Than A Mom

That is like, the million dollar question, isn’t it?  I remember when my children were in school, I was Cameron’s mom or one of my other 3 children’s moms. It is not that I disliked that identity, it’s just that was not all that I am.  As a matter of fact some days I didn’t want to be anyone’s mom.  It was really hard work and was not all that rewarding everyday. Some seasons of being a mom were real struggles. During those times of struggles if my ONLY identity was being someone’s mom, well, quite frankly I would have felt like a failure. My children were not perfect, and all of them were strong willed. They will little people with their own idea of how the world worked.

My Identity Does Not Come From My Career

I have been a nurse for 32 years. My nursing career has been a really great one.  I can say that I really love my job, but I realized a long time ago that I do not want my identity to come from nursing.  Let’s face it, everyday is not good at work. It’s called work for a reason, right? Throughout my 32 years of working I did not go home everyday and say, “I hit that one out of the ballpark.” No, there were days I struggled.  I have always gone to work with good intentions of doing my best and I always strive for that.  I am also human and did not always have perfect days. So I do not want my identity to come from my job.

The Voice In My Head

I realize also that we have voices in our heads that are not always truthful as well.  We can have times that are difficult and we can begin to believe our identity is tied up in the sum of our circumstances. This is also not good.  Our circumstances in life that come along are not our identity.  Divorce, financial difficulties, or illness do not determine who we are.

You Are Not The Sum Of Your Upbringing

I do not believe we are even the sum of our upbringing.  Not everyone came from a picture perfect upbringing. Yet many people in all kinds of circumstances find a person identity that is remarkable. So how can we do it?

Start by asking yourself the hard questions?

• What do I want my life to look like 30 years from now? When you look at the future ask yourself how you want to be remembered.  Honesty is a big deal to me.  I always say I want to be remember as honest.
• When someone says your name, what description should come with it? Will people remember you as a go getter, someone with integrity.
• Do you want to be remembered as a person that values humanity? I do! How we view others and the world around us tells a lot about our self identity.

Are You Stuck With Who You Are?

Heck no, I am glad I am not the same person I was 36 years ago.  I was a selfish, prideful, thrill seeking young girl. My identity was tied up in make up and how skinny I was. Yep, pretty disgusting, but not anymore. Life has helped me mature and  you can do the same thing. Evaluation of where you are and redirecting sometimes is a good thing.  Don’t let your past stop you from recreating a future. Determine who you want to be and press towards the mark. As a Christ follower my identity has always been in Him. That is what keeps me grounded. Knowing that I am loved and that there is purpose in everyone’s life. Know that all men and women have value keeps my grounded.

Teach your children the things that matter most in life. Help them to realize their identity does not come from things, or their grades, but from something inside of them. Teach them that man has value, all men and women have value and finding a purpose is the most valuable thing in life.

Just remember your self identity and self worth should never be tied to what you have. I sew and love fabric shops. I remember going to a fabric shop one time and there was a poster on the wall.

                                                She Who Dies With The Most Fabric Wins

 

I do not want to be remember as the one who dies with the most fabric!!!!! I want to be remember as honest, high integrity, loyal and Jesus follower.  Think about the things you want to be remember for. Those are the things your self identity should be found in and based on. Not all the other roles in life that are fluid and unstable.  Honestly, Janet

If you have time listen to the song by Lauren Daigle. It is amazing and speaks to the heart about our self identity and self worth.  It is called, You Say and you can click on the highlighted title to listen to it.

She is pretty amazing and here is her link to get the CD Lauren Daigle