It’s Not Selfish to Want To Be Still

It’s really not selfish to want to be still. Have you ever felt like doing something for yourself was, well, selfish? As moms, wives, daughters, even sisters we find it really hard to allow time just for just us. For me, this has always been a problem. I have never been able to just sit. If I actually took the time to sit, it involved cross-stitching, knitting, or hand sewing of some kind as well. I used to say the bathroom was the only time I got to have alone and even that got interrupted, but just sitting and having a quiet time doesn’t happen.

You know, it’s not just about being a mom or all the other people we are. The other problem is the fact that we have trouble finding the time to sit still. It feels like there is a shortage of time in a day. I don’t really like to sit and it is hard to be quiet without doing that. Sitting and being quiet is a discipline and takes practice. There are events in life that sometimes force us to be still and in those moments we learn things about being quiet.

It’s Not Wasted Time

It can feel like sitting still is wasting time. Something about stillness and quietness makes us feel like we are doing nothing useful. We just need to change our perspective on what being still and having quiet time is and not think of it as wasted time.

I read something recently that made me think about this. The comment was something like this, “Just because I said I was doing nothing, doesn’t mean I want to do something.” 🙂 That comment resonated with me because we have trouble saying no to something, whatever it is. Doing nothing can be really refreshing, but we don’t like to miss out, do we? Fear of being left out is a real fear. Some of the feelings of guilt about taking time for ourselves come from the season of life we are in. Having four children ten years apart did not leave much time for me.

During this season of my life I realized that doing nothing is really hard, but during the moments of doing nothing is when I usually heard something.

Quite Moments, What Do We Find There

We are so busy that we forget how to do nothing. Finding time to rest, contemplate and breathe is refreshing to the soul. In the quietness we find solace. Besides the physical benefits of stillness,

Besides giving our ears a break, silence has been shown to offer significant health advantages that boost overall well-being. From a physiological standpoint, silence helps:

• Lower blood pressure, which can help prevent heart attack.
• Boost the body’s immune system.
• Benefit brain chemistry by growing new cells. A 2013 study found that two hours of silence could create new cells in the hippocampus region, a brain area linked to learning, remembering, and emotions.

According to Psych Central, there are so many benefits to stillness and quiet, real physical benefits. I like to think about more of the emotional benefits related to being still.

Joy

There is so much noise in our world. Even if you are sitting in a room without media noise there is still the fan of the heating system, the electrical appliances buzzing, just so much noise. Do you remember the last time the power went out and the silence that followed? I sure do. It is almost magical.

Recently our power went out for hours. It was about twelve hours to be exact. The silence really was golden. Listening to nothing can be joyful. We have so few moments to really unwind and hear the birds, the wind, or if you’re fortunate the water. The sounds of nature and the warmth of the sun can bring us joy.

Our minds go through so many decisions to be made in a day’s time we don’t even realize what is happening. Decision fatigue is a real thing. In my post, “Decision Fatigue and How a Routine Can Prevent It” I talk about the number of decisions we make on a daily basis. We have gotten so used to making the many decision we make, we don’t even recognize our exhaustion. Quiet and rest can give us strength and joy for the day.

Resolve

The number of decisions we make in a day keeps our minds cluttered. We can pick up a magazine, read the articles and an hour later not know what we have read. This is especially a problem when what we are reading is important. Resolution to DO something is not enough. It takes quiet and time. Resting and contemplating the things we read, say, and want to do can lead to real resolve. Quiet moments offer us a chance to stop the constant swirl of thoughts.

Comfort

There are not many things that bring comfort Quiet, solace, rest, and stillness bring comfort to the body. Meditation balances the Body’s Systems is an article in Web MD. The article talks about the very fact that we are not taught how to sit, especially Americans. Great comfort can be found in rest. This allows the body and mind to be in the same place. Often as our bodies move our minds move even faster.

I will have to admit that quiet and rest can come to us when we least expect it. Accidents, broken limbs, and diagnoses that are not as planned can be some of the things that slow us down. These moments in time can bring great comfort.

Discovery

Silence can be intimidating. Being quiet and listening to the sounds around you that are natural can be a wonderful time of discovery. Did you know that birds make the loveliest of sounds when they are resting on tree branches, especially in the morning at the time they are looking for food?

Rest, silence, and doing nothing can be a great time of discovery. Recently, I spent a lot of time resting, not voluntarily. The time in silence, hearing the birds outside and resting gives us time to think.

Resting and thinking give us the chance to discover our feelings. We are rarely still, busyness is our enemy. Thinking about life and the things that affect us in a real way takes moments of silence. Discovery takes time.

Find Out for yourself

Give it a try. Take some time to enjoy the silence. Take a day free of television, radios, computers, and streaming devices. If you can’t do it for a day, try an hour. Soon the weather will be pleasant and you can sit outside in the sunshine listening to nature’s sweet sounds. Commit to fifteen minutes of silence a day. Journal about the experience. Write the thoughts down after your time of silence and see where your mind wanders to. You may be pleasantly surprised. There may be a real discovery about your feelings uncovered in those precious moments of stillness and silence. There is a reason God said, “Be still and know that I am God. Psalms 46:10. Maybe that is the very best way to hear Him. 🙂 Stop striving and rest in God.