Be a Confident Leader Disguised As A Mom

Confident leaders disguised as a mom are world changers. Leadership is one of the new buzz words. You can hear about leading in every office meeting, and team practice. Confident leadership is not often discussed in cafes, mom groups, or schools. Yet that is exactly what moms do. This is just a gentle reminder to step up and lead moms.

Who Are We leading?

Good question, right?

You can take a leadership class in college, workplaces and even online, but rarely are they promoting a mom taking the class. Yet I think it is the most important job you will ever have and you will need strong leadership skills.

What do moms need to do in their homes? Leaders teach others to lead. Good leaders pass that skill on to the next generation. Moms need to be leading their own families. 

I had four strong-willed children. There were days I thought I would not survive to raise them up. A wise woman told me to spend every day in prayer over them, which I did. The other advice she gave me was to remember, one day they will not be children and we do not know what God will call them to do.

Lead your children so that they will become the leader of tomorrow. Not just a leader in this world, but a godly leader with integrity. Don’t be afraid to tell the tiny human in your home, this is how the world is supposed to be. God gave them to you.

I recently saw a Facebook post that said, “If you do not teach your children who God is someone else will teach them who He is not.”

Mom As The Leader

Lead them to Truth 

There was a Jesuit priest that once said,

“Give me a child till he is 7 and I will give you the man.”

The truth in that statement is life is brief.  The time you have to lead your family is very, very short. So there are truths you need to instill in them early. From the crib is where you will need to start imparting the truth to your children. 

Lead Confidently From The cradle

Believe me, it will not be long before lies will be infiltrated into your home and your children will be the victims of these lies. 

When my oldest son was young we used to watch VHS tapes. Yeah, I know, they are old school. I ordered some tapes from a Family oriented company. We put one in and there before my eyes the little cute adorable squirrel started to have some kind of out of body spiritual experience, for real. I was kind of shocked.

Now I did not freak out or anything like that, but I did wonder what Cameron would think about this weird experience he was watching. Needless to say, I removed this tape from our selection. Not because there was some overtly evil plan in these tapes, but because it was not anything I wanted my four-year-old to watch.

Teaching about life and death is important. I may be able to discern that the character that comes by from death after being killed in season 1 of a show is not reality. Your 3-4 year can not. We must step up and lead in even the simplest of ways.

See, we are responsible for what our children learn and live by. Who we are starts to develop at a very early age. That is why the Jesuit priest said give me a child till he is 7 and I will give you the man.

Much is learned inside our homes and with our families. Trips to the grocery store offer opportunities to teach our young families as well as many other times at home.

I don’t mind reading about things that are not real. As a matter of fact, I really enjoy fiction, including a really good novel about magic.

How To Teach Truth To Children

Here is where we have to draw the line for our children.  The place between make-believe and reality is very narrow. Especially in a child’s mind. So, reading stories that are not true can be a very good way to teach what is truth and what is not the truth. 

Reading fiction and non-fiction.

An innocent and precious story about Peter Rabbit is not true, but never- the- less fun to read about.  Here is the perfect way to tell your children the difference between what is true and what is not. Rabbits don’t really talk or do what their mother tells them not to do.

Reading the story of David and Goliath can also seem like an unrealistic story, but guess what, this is a real event that really happened. God said it, so we believe it. Share the amazing events of the bible with your children in story fashion. The remind them, these even are true.

Starting very early in children’s lives will make this lesson so easy to teach.

Modeling Truth

Other places that truth can be taught is at fairs and carnivals. When a 3 year can get in an event for free, don’t ask your five-year-old to lie about their age. What seems harmless to a parent can be detrimental to your future leader. Teaching what truth is has to start early in life to be foundational. 

Sometimes we say things that just are not true. For instance, “If you don’t eat all of your suppers I am going to send it to some starving children in India.” We say things sometimes in half-truths and outright lies too. Children recognize that. 

Good leaders are truthful. They teach truth and model truth.  It is essential to do both as we raise our families. We do not know what role they will play in the future. Teaching them what truth is and modeling truth is a mark of good leadership. Moms, step up and do your part in being a leader at home. Your future leader depends on it.

John 14:6  I am…….Truth. 

Selflessness

Being a confident leader disguised as a mom starts with teaching selflessness. Being selfless is just not taught in the world.  As a matter of fact, in every marketing campaign in the last few years has been about getting YOURS.  

All kinds of slogans promote getting what is yours first, and quickly We are constantly reminded that what we want can be bought. We have to have it, whatever it is. Let me say one thing here, our children don’t need to be encouraged towards selfishness.  If you have ever listened closely to your little ones in the morning when their feet hit the floor, they start thinking about themselves. 

Learn to be content in whatever circumstance you are in.

Saint Paul Philippians 4:11

Honestly, we all could think about this a little more. It is in our nature to think about ourselves,  a lot. That makes it our job to lead our family to practice unselfishness.  Unselfishness comes with knowing the world does not revolve around you. 

Don’t Give In To Their Every Whim

It is so easy to say Yes and not easy to say NO.  I know, I’ve been there. Our children will beg or mercilessly pitch a fit for something they want.  Often out of pride or embarrassment we give in to these temper tantrums. 

Giving in to a demand from a 3-year-old just teaches them how to get their way. Believe me, when I say, it is often easier to say yes when you should be saying no. This is where your leadership skills must come into play. You will have to build up enough courage and strength to say, “No” and mean it when you say it.

My children were so smart. They knew exactly how many times to cry and plead before I would give in. Manipulation starts early.

Selfishness does not have to be learned.  When you bring home a precious newborn baby no one has to teach them how to think about themselves, right? Good leaders have to instill in others the belief that the world is not all about them. 

This is a lesson that must be taught to our children almost all of their lives.  I looked at my teenagers at certain times in life and thought, are you 3 years old again?  Have you ever heard the term Universe Head? That is how I described my teenagers over the years.  They were the Universe and we just revolved around their world. 

Be Confident in leading and don’t give in

So, become a good leader and teach that life is not just about you. A good way to teach children that life is not just about them is taking a trip to other cities, states or even countries. Getting out of your environment and seeing other places can be eye-opening for children. 

If you have never seen poverty or how others barely get by then you can’t believe it really exists.

Understanding the difference between your community, city, state, and country can be an eye-opener.  Seeing the fact that not everyone lives the way you do has to be taught to children. Honestly, we become so engrossed in our own circles, we all need this reminder. 

To lead your children well you must teach them that the world is not all about them.  Jesus said, “You will always have the poor among you.” truth!

Humanity Matters

Become a good leader for your children’s sake. Teach them that humanity matters. Other people matter. We need to love others and that has to be taught at home. 

Teaching your children to love others starts at home.  Unless you have extraordinary children you will need to lead them by showing love to other people. Starting with their cousins, siblings, and others in your immediate life, but you will have to extend that beyond your home. 

Leading your family in food drives and buying Christmas for another needy family can help create a focus on others outside of your family. Even doing a shoebox for a child in another country can be a life lesson, especially if we draw the parallel between what may have been under our trees.

Never Stop Leading

Remember, when your children are little, you are their leader.  They look to you for everything. This is the perfect time to teach them concern for other humans. 

Handling and understanding our emotions is hard enough for adults. It is important to help them understand everyone does not have enough as we do. Being concerned for someone else shows the importance of other human beings. 

To become the leader you want to be in your home you must express the importance of others. Here is where showing that you really believe that will be even more important.  There are a million ways to show we care about other people. 

Praise acts of kindness over being the best at something. Praise a grateful heart for someone else’s accomplishments.  Recognize poverty and need and do something about it. 

So, become a leader by championing the world filled with people that are different than you. 

Be A Confident Leader That Teaches Responsibility

We live in a privileged world.  If you don’t then this is not about your family. My family is privileged. Statistics show over and over again that if you are an American you are privileged. 

“Even if you’re stuck in the bottom 5% of the US income distribution your standard of living is about equal to that of the top 5% of Indians.”

So, that means even someone that considers themselves in America to not have much, we do. 

If you want to lead your children to become responsible adults then you will need to share with them how privileged we are. 

Don’t shelter your children from the reality that there are people crossing our borders with only the clothes on their backs. Let them hear and see this fact. 

Talk about what can be done as a family for these people. This is not a political issue, this is a caring issue.  We have a lot and as said by many people, with privilege comes responsibility. 

You may be surprised how easily your children will come up with a plan to help some other helpless person.  You may even be surprised how quickly your children recognize their own personal great wealth and want to share it. 

Be confident in leading with love

The last thing I would encourage you to do is lead in love. I found over my life that my children preformed far better in classroom that love was in. A teacher or leader that loves those being lead will not have any trouble leading.

Love is transformative. Love is forgiving of mistakes and love does not give up.

There will be trying days. Children are born with the inclination to think of themselves. Your leadership will be the key to changing their lives.

Tomorrow will call for leaders in this world. We want them to be honest, selfless, humble and strong leaders. You are the first person to teach them life’s most important lessons.

Be confident in your leadership. Know that your time is short. Remember that love is transformative and that perseverance is necessary too. Little people need you to lead them.

Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.” Your little flock is the most important flock in the world right now. Do as Jesus said and feed them. Never stop leading them and never ever stop teaching them.

I love you, but God loves you more. Honestly, Janet